Rhapsody for Vata

CHORUS (strum)
F
She's Vata, dry and light
Rough to the touch, cold as ice
Bf
Subtle and clear
C                          F
Can't stop moving around

VERSE (stutter)
F
Physically there ain't much to see
Thin body and knobbly knees
Bf
Cold hands, wiry hair
F
Skin and bone with no muscle tone
C
Hardly sweats
Bf                F
Dry like the desert

VERSE (stutter)
Mentally she's a real live wire
Bursts from the gate, but fast to tire
Quick to learn, quick to forget
Fun to live with, but can't commit
Changes her mind
Like she changes her clothes

CHORUS (strum)

VERSE (Up a key and higher tempo, stutter)
But oh no, she's feeling elation
Travelling around too much stimulation
Drinking alcohol, dosing caffeine
Too much talking, no daily routine
(strum)
And all the time the Vata's building up

VERSE (Up a key and higher tempo, stutter)
But oh no, now she's drying out
Thinks exercise is what it's all about
Suppressing normal body urges
Drying out with detoxing purges
And all the time the Vata's building up

VERSE (Up a key and higher tempo)
Oh no, it's getting colder
Not keeping warm like the Sages told her
Drinking drinks with lots of ice
Eating raw food against advice
And all the time the Vata's building up

CHORUS 
Aggravated Vata, looks like a ghost
Shaking like a leaf with irrelevant speech
Disrupted sleep
Weaker every day

CHORUS
Vitiated Vata, black discolorations
Distended abdomen and constipation
Craving for heat
Dizzy and peevish

Smoke it sparingly

(Plucking top string and the second string in a pulse, and then two lower together twice)

VERSE
C
When your energy spikes
F                                     C
And you're feeling monkeylike
      F                               G
Like a 4 year old with ADD on coke

C
Hold back it's not too late
F                              C
Just before you levitate
   Am                               G
Please please smoke it sparingly

Vata's coursing through your veins
You're a human hurricane
Ready to blow the whole town down

Channel the fields of your tantra
Recite this simple mantra
Please please smoke it sparingly

CHORUS
C
Smoke it sparingly
F
Smoke it sparingly
G                                C
It's precious smoke it sparingly

VERSE
When the touch paper ignites
And the fireworks are bright

You're illuminated for the world to see

Before the glorious flash
Imagine the subsequent crash
Please please to smoke it sparingly

How quickly it's beginning

The vibrating and the spinning

Soon it'll be out of control

Recall the crests before

And how you collapsed upon the floor

Please please smoke it sparingly

CHORUS

MIDDLE

C                       F        C
Take me down easy
C                       F        C
Take me down easy
   Am              F                             C
I know I gotta save a piece for me

VERSE
Maybe you've taken L-tyrosine

And you're soaring on caffeine
Ready to set the beast free

Realise the higher you go
The lower the low

Please please smoke it sparingly

You feel like Freddy Mercury

The Hulk or Hercules
Robin Williams on Ecstacy 

See yourself on the seesaw

Know the bipolarity law

Please please smoke it sparingly

Save me Snigdha

(Capo 1st)

VERSE
G
Dry and dusty cough? you need Snigdha
                                         D
Constipated every day, Snigdha
Em
Emaciated can't put on weight
C
Hyperactive heart rate
G             D        G
From receding gums, save me Snigdha

CHORUS
G
Oil up your backside
Em
Oil up the nose
C
Oil on your body, from your
D
Head to your toes

VERSE
Skin that's dry and flaky, you need Snigdha
Body thin and achy, Snigdha
Earache that's not an infection
Feeling lonely full of dejection
From gas and flatulence, save me Snigdha

CHORUS

VERSE
Headache pulsing from the back of head, Snigdha
Fear and anxiety, nervous dread, Snigdha
Sciatica, bouts of gout
Insomnia or burnt-out
Diseases of the spleen, save me Snigdha

We're all screwed

CHORUS

G                          D        G

We're all completely screwed
                                   D

Yes we're all completely screwed
G

We're all going to die in a preventable way

C
And suffer every single step of the way

D
We're all completely screwed

VERSE
G
Well our dominant dosha makes life tough
C
And our perverse love for like makes it even more rough
D
But what about the fact that our family's the same dosha?

So those poor old Kapha girls and boys
Get a slow start in life with sedentary toys
And get fed comfort food on a daily basis

While the Pitta kids get a pushy mum
Who wants top grades and every trophy won
Whatever you've done will never ever be good enough

CHORUS

We're all completely screwed

We're all completely screwed

We're all going to die in a forseeable way

And suffer every single step of the way

We're all completely screwed

VERSE
G

So we're crazy

Our families crazy

We're doomed to a crazy life
C

So who do we pick for a husband or wife?

D
Well, somebody who's our kinda crazy

So Kapha wants some company at home
Pitta wants someone with a real backbone
And Vata, what about poor old Vata

A Vata woman who wants a life that's full

Goes for a butterfly instead of a bull

Gets a guy who can't finish anything he starts

And Vata gets what Vata gives
Vata lovers have Vata kids

Soon there's Vata blowing up your home

CHORUS

We're all completely screwed

All our lives are utterly doomed

The only perverted pleasure in the plays

Is that everyone can die in their own special way

We're all completely screwed

MIDDLE
Acoustic D - C - G x4

VERSE
Part 3
Friends
Colleagues
All the other people you choose to be around
Like animals, we move in a pack

Now Pitta wants a high pressure career
They gotta lot to prove, it's failure they fear
Choose competitive or subservient friends
That pay dividends

Statistically obesity is contagious
If you have fat friends
You're 57% more likely to be fat
So Kapha folks beware
Don't go there

CHORUS

Ayurveda lifestyle blues

VERSE
G
I've been trying to live an Ayurvedic life
C                                    G
With the wisdom of the ancient minds
C                                 G
But I wonder if they'd have been so wise
C                                  G
If they had to live in these times

Can’t sit cross-legged in the restaurant
Can’t lie down on the aeroplane
Can’t do what your urges want
                              D
And it all adds up to pain

I’ve been having an oil massage every day
Oil in my hair and enemas
Footprints on the stairs
My girlfriend's in despair

And the only food I cook is Kitchari
Now she's thinking about leaving me
Too many turmeric stains
She thinks that I'm insane

C                                G
I've got the Ayurveda blues
C                            C
The Ayurveda blues

CHORUS
C                          G
Chlorine in the water
C                       G
Plastic everywhere
C                         G
EMF from everything

D
No one seems to care

Particles in the air
Pesticides in food
Modified and fertilised

                         D
To a malevolent magnitude
C                   G
And I'm on my guard

D                   C                      G
But health these days is so hard

VERSE
And you I'd know to like to sleep from 8-4
But then my friends all feel ignored
I gotta keep the balance right

                                    D
But I belong in bed at night

To meditate in the Brahama Muhurta
Is it to take a step closer to God
And every day that I fail to pray
I take another step further away

The secret is the seasons
But nobody wants the reasons
As the last sane man alive
It’s a very lonely drive

I know I gotta be a guiding light
Living the life I know is right
I can't change the world just me
So I'll be the change I want to see

I've got the Ayurveda blues
The Ayurveda blues

CHORUS

MIDDLE
Em
The sages foresaw
C
All these problems before
G                                    D
And predicted the rise of the cities

While they studied us
We know so little of them
Only how poorly we compare to these men

(Long strum)
C                      Em
But their Sutras survive
C                         G
And they make perfect sense
C          Em
All we need
C              G
Is obedience

Handed down
From enlightened minds
And been proved right
A million times

OUTRO (VERSE)
G
I don't need no AI
C
Ain't gonna rely
G
On no computers
C                 G
I've faith in Sutras

I don't need no AI
Charaka's my guy
You keep computers
I've faith in Sutras
-->
(Repeat to fade)
x

LYRICS

I've been trying to live an Ayurvedic life
With the wisdom of the ancient minds
But I wonder if they'd have been so wise
If they had to live in these times

Can’t sit cross-legged in the restaurant
Can’t lie down on the aeroplane
Can’t do what your urges want
And it all adds up to pain

I’ve been having an oil massage every day
Oil in my hair and enemas
Footprints on the stairs
My girlfriend's in despair

And the only food I cook is Kitchari
Now she's thinking about leaving me
Too many turmeric stains
She thinks that I'm insane

I've got the Ayurveda blues
The Ayurveda blues

Chlorine in the water
Plastic everywhere
EMF from everything

No one seems to care

Particles in the air
Pesticides in food
Modified and fertilised

To a malevolent magnitude
And I'm on my guard

But health these days is so hard

And you I'd know to like to sleep from 8-4
But then my friends all feel ignored
I gotta keep the balance right

But I belong in bed at night

To meditate in the Brahama Muhurta
Is it to take a step closer to God
And every day that I fail to pray
I take another step further away

The secret is the seasons
But nobody wants the reasons
As the last sane man alive
It’s a very lonely drive

I know I gotta be a guiding light
Living the life I know is right
I can't change the world just me
So I'll be the change I want to see

I've got the Ayurveda blues
The Ayurveda blues

Chlorine in the water
Plastic everywhere
EMF from everything

No one seems to care

Particles in the air
Pesticides in food
Modified and fertilised

To a malevolent magnitude
And I'm on my guard

But health these days is so hard

The sages foresaw
All these problems before
And predicted the rise of the cities

While they studied us
We know so little of them
Only how poorly we compare to these men

But their Sutras survive
And they make perfect sense
All we need
Is obedience

Handed down
From enlightened minds
And been proved right
A million times

I don't need no AI
Ain't gonna rely
On no computers
I've faith in Sutras

I don't need no AI
Charaka's my guy
You keep computers
I've faith in Sutras

Why are you running, you're already thin (Like increases like)

VERSE
A                                   E                   A
Why are you running, you're already thin
A
The last thing you need is exercise
E
Look at the state you're in
D
You want to be fitter
A
Vata want to go faster
D
But your little life force
A
Ain't gonna last you
D                                          E
You're running straight into your grave
A                                   E                   A
Why are you running, you're already thin

VERSE
Why are you eating, you're already big
You've grown up all the away and more
It's time to reel it in
Kapha could go for a week
On a glass of water
One meal a day
Wouldn't make you any shorter
You're spooning yourself a big grave
Why are you eating, you're already big

MIDDLE
                A
They all say
                 B7
We have a choice
                D
But we're tuned in
            A
To a voice
             A
A frequency
                 B7
It's our vibration
                 D
And in this life, the rule is
     E7                A
Like, increases like

VERSE
Why are you working, you're already rich
You haven't spent the money you've got
Why does Pitta need some more?
Retire today
And live comfortably
Treat yourself
And your family
You want to buy yourself a big grave?
Why are you working, you're already rich

Agni vs. Ama

INTRO

Gm

There are two digestive concepts

That will turn your world around

Bf                                               

They determine both the length

A/Bf

And your quality of your life

Understand both sides

It's Agni

vs. Ama

The fire of Agni is enzymes

Hot, Light, Dry and Penetrating

You're not simply what you eat

Only what you metabolise

And when there's indigestion

Some Ama

Gets left behind

At any of the stages

From Rasa through to Shukra

If it can't process the food

Into a dhatu or a mula

Then there's malabsorption

And some Ama

Gets left behind

CHORUS

D#                                   Bf

When there's too much Ama inside

D#                  Gm                   Bf

You're guaranteed to feel at ease

    D#                      F 

It's the soil, for disease

VERSE

Ama is the toxins

Cold, heavy, oily, dull

How bad has it become?

Check the map upon your tongue

As it slowly accumulates

The flame of Agni

Goes down

Help it with cold water

Feed it eating late

Then have an early breakfast

The bad mixing takes place

Whenever you eat without hunger

The flame of Agni

Goes down

CHORUS

If your Agni becomes too weak

You're guaranteed to feel ill at ease

The door's open, for disease

OUTRO

Bf                           Gm

May your Agni be strong

D#                                       F

Then your lifespan will be long

When you detox your Ama

You bring forth good karma

When your Agni is strong

Ama's long gone

VERSE
The battle of your life

Is your Agni 
vs Ama

Lord of the Doshas (6 tastes)

VERSE (One strum)
Cm
Come with me down to a sub-cellular level
D#
I've got something important to tell you
F
Your life and the taste
G#
On these rules they are based

In total there are 6 tastes
Successively lower in energy
The first three have Snigdha and will pacify Vata
But cause water retention in Kapha

VERSE (Pause)
We begin with....

Sweet Madhura also cooling and heavy
Builds the body and stabilises the mind
Great for Pitta but don't go crazy
Excess leads to obese diseases

D#
The sour Amla liquid, light and heating
Cm
But soaking up liquid can be bad for Pitta
G#
Stimulates the appetite and aids digestion
A#
Too much means acidity

Salty Lavana what is your Karma?
Heating and heavy for growth and balance
But too much will also aggravate Pitta
Excess for all causes ageing

A#
The actions of these three increase

CHORUS
D#
These are the tastes, that define us
A#
They are the rules, that intwine us
Fm
Everything that you've done, is simply the sum
G#
If you master the tastes then you will become
     A#                  Cm
A lord of the Doshas

(Once round)

VERSE
Bitter Tikta, the first drying tastes
All increase Vata and decrease Kapha
Also cooling and light so great for Pitta
But it's a depleting taste so go steady

Pungent Ushna, light and heating

Avoid it Pitta, it will send you up in flames
Improves absorption and aids digestion
Excess causes fatigue

Astringent Kashaya the most drying taste
Cooling and heavy make it good for Pitta
Scrapes out fat and decongests
But in excess it can lead to a stroke

The actions of these three decrease

CHORUS

MIDDLE
D#m
Why are there only 6 tastes?
A#m
Because there are 6 seasons
G#m                                                       A#
Between the winter and the summer solstice

Uttarayana is the first half
With Bitter, Astringent and Pungent tastes
Become successively stronger
As the wind dries and the sun stays out longer

Then in Dakshinayana the earth slowly cools
The luna energy grows
F                                 G#                      A#
Sour, Salt and Sweet increase respectively
As the water starts to flow

(Acoustic once round to fade)

Dermal dreams

VERSE (hot)
C                               F              C
I am a picture of a health and well-being
C                             F              C

I exercise routinely twice a day 

F                                           C

I run at lunch in the midday sun

F                                           C

Then a sauna when I'm done

F

I cleanse my body with spicy, oily food

G

Look for a healthier guy, you'll find no one

C

Guaranteed

BRIDGE

Am                                  C

But I got this rash that won't go away

CHORUS

F                                          C

It must be something in my genes

F                             C

Still I hold onto the dream

F                               G                  C

That one day I will find the right cream

VERSE (rough)

My girlfriends started on a strict raw food regime

She's a model you know, the fittest girl you've seen

She takes supplements and extra fibre

She's so much energy can pull all-nighters

A live wire, this girls on fire

BRIDGE

But her skin is so very dry

CHORUS

I always sympathise with her

Always there advising her

Soon you're gonna find the right moisturiser

MIDDLE

VERSE

The Opposite of Vata

VERSE
F                C              Am                 C
It's crystal clear what Ayurveda can give me
F                Am             F             C
A nervous breakdown inside a week
F                C              Am                 C
Obsessing over how little things affect me
F                Am             F             C
I don't need another reason to worry

BRIDGE
F                   Am
The opposite of dry
F                 C
The opposite of cold
F              C            G
The opposite of stimulation

VERSE
When you say it like that it's not too complicated
But life is for living and spontaneity
I always forget what I've been educated
As I've said before I don't need more anxiety

BRIDGE

MIDDLE
Am                                  F
(2x round)
Camomile tea to kick start the day
From any excitement, staying away

Oil massages after any exercise session
Gentle yoga being the session in question

Sticking to soups forgoing salads
No loud music just classical ballads

I need to be boring, my life should be dull
Doing absolutely nothing, just sitting still

CHORUS
C       G                     F        G                   C
It's the opposite of dry, that you need to try
C       G                     F        G                                  C
It's the opposite of cold, how many times do you need to be told?
C                G                               F              G                                  C
The one that'll give you most frustration, the opposite of stimulation

Na na na na - stable not mobile
Na na na na - oily not dry
Na na na na - warm calm and collected
Na na na na - weighed down not flying around
Na na na na - fading out

Vikruti

(Acoustic intro)

Capo 7th

VERSE

Vata

G

You're feeling tired uptight a pretty sorry sight

Em

After years of gas and constipation

G

Craving heat, can't sleep, rings under your eyes

Em

No strength and emaciated

C

Deluded and dizzy, even having tremors

D

Talking all the time

VERSE

G

You're in pain, inflamed, for years it stays the same

Em

They test and test, but still it can't be named

C

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

D

You can't even get a real diagnosis

CHORUS

G

It could be a gluten allergy

Em

It could be a genetic malady

C

It could be mineral deficiency

D

When you've still got no idea about doshas

VERSE

Kapha

Heavy and hazy, lethargic and lazy

Body feels loose and cold

Poor digestion, salivation and white discolouration

You take test after test, for your respiratory distress

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

You can't even get a real diagnosis

CHORUS

It could be autoimmunity

It could be a parasitic disease

It could be an allergy to trees

When they've still got no idea about doshas

MIDDLE (Chorus chords)

Em

Perhaps they've misunderstood

G

And it's something from your childhood

Em

They just can't seem to do no good

D

And running out of ideas

Em

But you're emphatic

G

It's not psycosymatic

C

In fact you've had it

D

With this Western approach to medicine

VERSE

Pitta

Got a burning sensation, yellow discoloration

Of your faeces, urine, eyes, and skin

So hungry, so thirsty, so very little sleep

You take test after test, and the specialists go deep 

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

You can't even get a real diagnosis

CHORUS

what could it be?

They know what it should be

If only you would be

A little co-operative surely

Gluten allergy? Do bey do bey

Iodine deficiency? Do bey do bey

Imaginary? Do bey do bey

It's nothing officially

LYRICS:

Vata

You're feeling tired uptight a pretty sorry sight

After years of gas and constipation

Craving heat, can't sleep, rings under your eyes

No strength and emaciated

Deluded and dizzy, even having tremors

Talking all the time

You're in pain, inflamed, for years it stays the same

They test and test, but still it can't be named

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

You can't even get a real diagnosis

It could be a gluten allergy

It could be a genetic malady

It could be mineral deficiency

When you've still got no idea about doshas

Kapha

Heavy and hazy, lethargic and lazy

Body feels loose and cold

Poor digestion, salivation and white discolouration

You take test after test, for your respiratory distress

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

You can't even get a real diagnosis

It could be autoimmunity

It could be a parasitic disease

It could be an allergy to trees

When they've still got no idea about doshas

Perhaps they've misunderstood

And it's something from your childhood

They just can't seem to do no good

And running out of ideas

But you're emphatic

It's not psychosomatic

In fact, you've had it

With this Western approach to medicine

Pitta

Got a burning sensation, yellow discoloration

Of your faeces, urine, eyes, and skin

So hungry, so thirsty, so very little sleep

You take test after test, and the specialists go deep 

They suggest treatments but no prognosis

You can't even get a real diagnosis

What could it be?

They know what it should be

If only you would be

A little co-operative surely

Gluten allergy? Do bey do bey

Iodine deficiency? Do bey do bey

Imaginary? Do bey do bey

It's nothing officially